The Dog Zone: A Step-By-Step Guide to Riding With Your K-9

“The greatest fear dogs know is the fear that you will not come back when you go out the door without them.” ~Stanley Coren

So…why disappoint him?  Try taking him with you!  What could be more fun than taking your dog with you on some water adventures?  Well…that does entirely depend on the dog.  Some dogs will love it, others will find it to be sheer terror.  It will also depend on how big or small your dog or doglet is.  Regardless of your situation, following are a few pointers on taking your canine companion on the water aboard your PWC.  (Note: end results may vary!)

STEP 1: Locate the doggie!  Debatably, this step is considered to be an “essential” part of the operation by some.  

Bribery is an acceptable method.

STEP 2: Outfit the doggie in a properly fitting floatation device.  Yes, I am aware that dogs are excellent swimmers.  But some doggies will swim to the point of exhaustion!  But the real benefit is the luggage handle on the back of the life jacket that will allow you to mechanically swoop in and snatch the dog out of the water should it go overboard in mid-cruise.  The high-viz yellow or orange will also make them visible to other boaters while they are in the water.  Moving propellers and doggies are a messy mix!

Visible-from-space dog luggage.

STEP 3: Introduce your dog to your PWC.  Some dogs may take to it immediately, like they belong there.  Others may be fearful and require dragging them by their toenails to get them aboard.  You may want to introduce them to it first on dry land, where they are likely to feel more comfortable walking around on it.  You must be patient and calm if your dog is reluctant!

STEP 4: Find the most stable and comfortable location on your ski for the dog to cruise from.  Depending on the size of the dog, that could be on the seat in front of you, in the foot well on one side, or on your lap.  Or, if your dog is anything like mine, it is all of the above, in a continuous panicky circuit.

Finding a suitable co-captain perch.

STEP 5: Start the ski and idle around near the dock for a few minutes.  The sensation and noise associated with the engine being on may make what was previously an acceptable situation unacceptable to them.  So keep it nice and slow for the first few minutes!  If your dog starts going into meltdown, proceed to Step 6; otherwise proceed to Step 7.

STEP 6: Take a long swig from your flask.

STEP 7: After the dog has found its sea legs/happy place, slowly get up on plane.  Depending on your dog’s comfort zone (or lack thereof), you may want to keep it at a speed that is just barely on plane.  Enough to be cruising comfortably but not too fast.  If your dog decides to take a swan dive when it sees a seagull or other water creature, it will be a much better scenario for both of you if you are not going 55 mph!

There is something about doing your business in the water...

STEP 8: Find an island or sandbar.  What happens next is totally up to the dog!  My dog’s favorite pastime when I take her to islands is eating garbage and rolling in dead things.  Whatever makes them happy!  But a word of caution…try to pick a clean, unpolluted island.  There are a multitude of things left behind by previous boaters (otherwise known as “slobs” back in Miami) that can be harmful to your pet.  Watch for broken glass, discarded chicken bones from previous BBQs, and other such treachery.  Thankfully, the Keys are much cleaner and safer for dog boating than Miami was!

Flasky!

STEP 8: Take several long swigs from your flask while the dog runs around and plays.

 STEP 9: Summon the doggie to make the return voyage.  Again, this step is optional.  As soon as the engine starts, they will come running!  The return journey is often much easier, because the dog is exhausted and now knows what to expect.

No more ode to fish carcass!

STEP 10: Wash the doggie!  Unless you want your house to smell like dog swamp-ass!

This concludes our summer seminar tutorial on How To Ride with a Doggie.  It is my hope that you will give it at least one try.  My dog tends to spaz out on the trip out, but then thoroughly enjoys herself once we get to our destination.  So I torture her with the initial stress for the great payout.  Plus the more you take them, the more they will get used to it/look forward to it.  Make sure their nails are reasonably trimmed, lest you want holes in your marine upholstery!  It’s hot as hell out there now…so go grab your dog and have some fun!

DogActivities should not be restricted to land!